Why aren’t we teaching our children how to understand their emotions? Maybe it’s because we don’t understand ours? Maybe it’s because we have been taught to ignore or deny what we are feeling. Feelings don’t lie. Our feelings are never wrong.

Three steps to dealing with strong emotions:

1. Feel your feelings. The problem is we have so little tolerance for uncomfortable feelings. Stop trying to escape them. Sit with them. They are a part of you. Feelings are not facts. They will pass but they will also come back to you.

2. Share your feelings. As social beings we are meant to share, especially our feelings. Share with a trusted person. It can bring you a sense of relief or a sense of calm. Sharing can help you to realize you are not alone and it can help you to find the answers you desperately seek.

3. Re-frame the situation. Give an emotion or event a different interpretation. Shakespeare says “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so”. How you sort and file events will affect how you feel about them.

Emotions make our lives rich.  Embrace them.  Understand them.

Parent Tip:  Help your children to sit with their uncomfortable feelings. Show them how to do it.  Talk about feelings.  Share them.  Seek guidance.  Read books.  Emotional intelligence is critical to your child’s future personal and professional success

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Licensed counselor and founder of Girls Stand Strong Michelle Kelley, LCSW, helps girls and women of all ages develop and improve their self-image, self-esteem, relationship and communication skills, emotional understanding, coping skills, the ability to handle difficult situations and people, and resiliency to create a brighter, better and more successful tomorrow. For more information about Michelle’s coaching and counseling services, call (703) 505-2413 or email michelle@girlsstandstrong.com.