Not all leaders are loud or bossy. Not all girls are loud or bossy. Many parents want to encourage their daughters to be leaders, but many girls shy away from this title – and for good reason. Girls have different personalities and some are shy and quiet and that’s okay.

Girls need to realize that leaders can be quiet, soft-spoken, introverted and thoughtful (as well as loud and bossy). Famous introverts include Abraham Lincoln, Rosa Parks and Mark Zuckerberg. I love Rosa Parks’ version of leadership. What she did was say NO! How powerful.

Tips to help girls embrace their own brand of leadership:

• Avoid “excessive” praise of girls who are well-behaved. I want girls to know that it is not the ultimate goal to NEVER get in trouble or to hold themselves up to impossible standards of “always being good”.

• Teach girls that all questions are good (though this may be contrary to how she feels in school) especially in middle school or if she has ever been made fun of for asking a question.

• Encourage girls to have a voice in their friendships. Can your daughter tell her friends what she wants to do when playing or does she let others decide?

• Teach girls the difference between speaking up (which you want her to do) versus talking back (which implies disrespect).

My goal is to help girls embrace their personality type, especially if they are quiet and introverted. They can be leaders – starting in their friendship circles and families.

Here’s to raising strong, confident and resilient girls!

 

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Licensed counselor and founder of Girls Stand Strong Michelle Kelley, LCSW, helps girls and women of all ages develop and improve their self-image, self-esteem, relationship and communication skills, emotional understanding, coping skills, the ability to handle difficult situations and people, and resiliency to create a brighter, better and more successful tomorrow. For more information about Michelle’s coaching and counseling services, call (703) 505-2413 or email michelle@girlsstandstrong.com.